silly thoughts

my favorite episode of house so far is the second episode of season two entitled acceptance. it’s about a 9-year old girl with cancer. i like it because it touched my heart. the girl was in remission but some complications happened, which endangered her life. she’s a brave little girl, wanting to live longer for her mother, but not a bit afraid to die. when her case was finally solved by house, all the doctors were on the lobby to give her a heartfelt goodbye. house didn’t want to join the "parade" because he’s not really a touchy-feely person, but he came down anyway. he was the last person approached by the girl, saying, "i’m not gonna kiss you or hug you" (can you imagine how he shows how hard his heart is). but the girl hugged her anyway, and tears just came pouring from my eyes.

i guess what appealed to me with this episode is the cancer. my paternal grandfather died of cancer and i’ve always thought that i’d die of cancer too. call me crazy but that really occurred to me. anyway, i’ve always thought i’d die of an illness. not of old age or an accident, but a plain old illness. i don’t like the idea of dying at home. a hospital is more appealing to me.

i really like the series because of the irony the character of hugh laurie presents. his heart is as hard as a rock but you know that deep down he cares. he tries to show that he’s really strong but all you see is his vulnerability. and i find him really funny. i love the humor of the show.

"What good is reading without memory? Come to thing of it, what good is anything without memory? A vertical slice of experience that can’t be accessed on the horizontal—is it actually worth anything? Did it even happen? If you can’t remember the tree falling in the forest, did it make a sound?"–hugh laurie on the O Magazine, february 2006

my sister calls me a tv addict. and i’m in the middle ground of acceptance and denial. well, i really don’t care, but i’m writing about it, which must mean i care. anyway, i’ve always been more on the visual side than the hearing side. but don’t get me wrong, i absolutely love listening to music. it’s just that it’s not on top of my list. when there’s nothing good to watch on tv, my attention turns to the stereo if i don’t have a good book to read.

ally mcbeal started it all. i think it’s the first tv series that i got hooked on. and then, everything else followed. i remember my routine when i was still studying in miriam. when i get home from school, i get on with my homework immediately after dressing up. my goal then was to finish all my homework before 6pm. by 6pm, i start watching the tv. i think the tv series i watch then besides ally mcbeal were the practice (i also love series with law in its plot), friends, and the xfiles (goodness, i don’t remember everything i watched. i really must be getting old).

the first tv series that i loved was the xfiles. i just love the show and david duchovny and gillian anderson. i didn’t like the show at the beginning. one night, my dad was watching it and i was begging him to change it to another channel. he didn’t cave so i had no choice but to watch it with him. and then i just suddenly loved it. well, fbi stuff just really interests me. and so, i followed it religiously until the series ended.

after xfiles, i still watched a lot of series like alias, gilmore girls, and everybody loves raymond (i think everyone should watch this show because it is just hilarious. for me, it’s at par with the comedy of friends, but most people would think otherwise). and now, the show that i love after xfiles is house, m.d. it’s humor is extraordinary. unfortunately, very few people find it interesting so i really don’t have anyone to share it with. i love house. and then it dawned on me, why do i watch all these medical dramas? my mom always complains when she sees me watching reruns of grey’s anatomy, saying that i’m not in med school or something. i really wonder why medical drama interests me. and then, i came to the conclusion that i may be a doctor in my past life. haha. absurd but it’s quite an answer to my question. haha.

and after all the tv series that i follow, maybe i am a tv addict. shucks.

"the eyes can mislead, a smile can lie, but the shoes always tell the truth!"–house m.d.

i’ve always found clean guys very attractive. clean guys for me, by definition, are those who do not have any facial hair and keep their hair very short (almost skinhead). look at george clooney in one fine day for an example. but i know that it just doesn’t work for some guys like brendan fraser or pierce brosnan (i really can’t imagine them being skinhead). even so, my view still stands. i still go for the clean guys. i guess i really don’t understand men (just like the way they don’t understand women) why some want to keep their hair long or why some want a lot of facial hair. i’ve always told myself, ‘i have yet to see a guy who looks attractive while looking dirty’ (not dirty per se, but the opposite of my definition of a clean guy). and finally, i’ve found him (an english guy i always see on tv). but i guess i didn’t find him in an honest manner. i happened to see his before and after pictures. and thank god he decided to grow a mustache and a beard. really looks good on him. it lightens up his face also, as compared to looking clean, which gives him a dull face. and he has an amazing american accent too, even if he’s british

i was mistaken as a law student today in starbucks in shangri-la. i’ve always wanted to be a lawyer but the system here in the country discourages me. thinking about it now, is should be the other way around. it should have encouraged me by thinking that i can do something to make it better. anyway, it didn’t. when my family and i were joking around, they’d also tell me i should have been a lawyer because they say i’m really ‘makulit’. i always want things to be my way. i never ran out of reasons that they just give up arguing with me. my paternal grandfather is the only lawyer in my dad’s side of the family. the family would’ve been happy if there was one grandchild who became a lawyer. unfortunately, there’s none who followed his footsteps.

i’ve always wanted to be a lawyer. at least someone thought i was on the way to becoming a lawyer. haha.

"truth begins in lies."–house m.d.

some people had an epiphany while still a kid of what they were going to be when they grow up. there’s kris aquino, who always tells her story about being such a talkative kid and wanting to be in show business, and now, she’s a talk show host. there’s also my high school friend patti, who first took up computer science (i think) in u.p. but took another course (something about film). back in high school, she was the one editing our short films for our media class. there’s also the classic story of successful businessmen who tell people that when they were kids, they were selling all sorts of things from stationery to food to whatever. and what about me? i don’t remember doing something as a kid and doing it again now, thinking that it will be my future. so what will i be in the future? shucks.